Death

One of my brother’s best friends from high school, Aaron Brown, was shot and killed on Friday night. Here’s the Washington Post article. Aaron was 18 years old.

Aaron and some friends apparently made an IHOP run late at night, and left without paying –UPDATE — the staff thought they left without paying. People who were there say that they left the money on the table. –UPDATE– The store staff told a uniformed police officer eating there, who ran into the parking lot and tried to stop them. They were already driving, failed to stop their car and the officer opened fire, apparently fearing for his life. Aaron was sitting behind the driver. He was hit by the bullets and killed instantly. The driver was arrested on possession of pot, and driving while intoxicated.

I’m sure there are dozens of details in here that give credit, blame, irony or pathos to the situation. Those details are totally unimportant to me right now. I ate at that IHOP late at night when I was in high school and just back from college. So did amnesiadust and Judson. You guys remember that parking lot.

I don’t know much about Aaron. The few times I met him, I perceived a kind, gentle person who was a close friend to my brother. He was unfailingly polite and respectful to me … unusual when you’re 30 and meet your high school aged brother’s friends. I’ve heard the same from the rest of my family. He and my brother played in bands together all through school. My parents became friends with his parents, through shared activities, and developed a mutual respect.

In many of the pictures I see of my brother having fun with friends, Aaron is right there beside him. The picture above is my brother and Aaron at their senior guitar club concert. My brother is in front playing lead, Aaron behind him on backup.

When my brother went to college for guitar and recording arts, Aaron started studying studio recording at a community college. He was planning to work with my brother after they both graduated. They supported each other, as many of the folks who read this journal support me. Best buddies, band-mates, and people with wild plans for the future. Most likely they stayed up late together, plotting to take over the world … and they undoubtedly ate at IHOP when they got hungry after the late night bull sessions.

Now Aaron is dead because of his seating choice, because he went on an ill fated IHOP run, because a group of 18 year old boys was dumb. I don’t see much of a lesson in the details of Aaron’s death. Sure, the guys were –EDIT– may have been –EDIT– dumb to leave without paying. Dumb to be 18 and go to the IHOP after the driver had a few beers. Dumb, but most likely unrelated, for the driver to bring the stash of pot with them. I’ve ridden in the back seat of dumber situations.

I feel awful for the survivors. The driver will carry that mistake with him for the rest of his life, my brother lost a close friend with sudden violence. Aaron’s parents thought they were safely out of the danger zone in terms of raising their son, and now he’s gone.

All I can take from it this morning is this: The world is a swiftly violent, incomprehensible place. If you care about someone, if they matter to you, tell them. You might not have the chance tomorrow.

That, plus this: Pay your bill, and when the cop says “stop,” stop.