Now I’ll Eat Anything

Once again, the artists statement for The Pain speaks for me:

“Now I’ll Eat Anything” makes a pretty good motto for the American presidential campaign in general. It’s gotten to be that time, when both candidates will eat absolutely anything they have to to win. A nice metaphor for every humiliating pose they have to strike, every dumb hat they have to wear, every fanatical or unrealistic position they have to espouse if they want to be president. Yes–I will nuke Tehran! I unconditionally support Israel no matter what atrocity or affront to human rights it perpetrates. America has no greater friend than Israel. America has no greater friend than Ireland. America has no greater friend than Poland. There is no greater threat to our national security than Cuba. Statehood for Puerto Rico! My pappy took me hunting every week when I was a kid. Bring me a deer–I will shoot it! I love the Lord Jesus Christ with all my heart. Bring me a pancake that looks like Jesus–I will worship it. Bring me your ugly squalling baby, its face slimy with mucus—I will kiss it. I believe marriage is between a man and a woman. I believe Creationism deserves equal footing with Evolution. I will certainly look into your concerns RE 9-11/ the Disclosure Project/ Stephen King’s connection to the assassination of John Lennon. I feel more strongly about the issue of nuclear waste at Yucca Mountain than about the threat of al Qaeda, the national health care crisis, and the tanking economy combined. I will make oil prices come back down. I will never raise taxes under any circumstances. I will deport all the illegal Mexicans. I’ll deport the Arabs! Shit, I’ll line up all the dirty Irish and shoot ‘em, just for sweet fuck’s sake please vote for me.